I don’t find I kill my darlings. There can usually be a place for them, if not in the story, somewhere else. I might even extract the idea of it and plant it in another story. I don’t tell my scenes no, just “not right now”. Or “not here”. Kindler and gentler?

I always took it to mean not to get wrapped up in how good we think something is if it doesn’t advance the story or add substance. A scene can be brilliant and still totally wrong for a story.